Why do people cheat?

This is a question I could never understand. Why would someone in a committed relationship feel the need to be unfaithful? Guys and girls both cheat. Some keep doing it for months and even years without getting a caught—a thought that literally makes me shudder. Why wouldn’t someone just want to break it off with their current partner BEFORE getting with someone else? There are various different reasons why someone cheats and various different ways how they do it.

People cheat because well, they CAN. Sure you might be with someone and you might even be happy with said person, but the minute you are alone at a bar and a hot guy/girl approaches you, your mind literally numbs. You forget about all the wonderful things about your current partner and you get with this other person. Maybe you only dance and flirt, maybe you only make out, or maybe you take the person home and have wild drunk sex with them. Either way, it’s cheating. Sure, they are all various different levels of cheating, but I’d be upset if my boyfriend did either. Nowadays, we need to worry about a new type of cheating with all the technology out there. Sexting, phone sex, and cyber sex are becoming so common and people don’t view it as cheating—but guess what? It most certainly is. I don’t want some girl to be typing “I want your____ in my ____” to my boyfriend. Words can be just as powerful as actions.

People also cheat because they aren’t happy. Maybe your partner just isn’t giving you enough of his/her time and you just need someone emotionally. So you start talking to someone—first innocently texting—and then later talking on the phone or meeting up so that your emotional void is filled. You don’t want to end your current relationship because it’s comfortable and you can’t imagine this person being out of your life. So you keep it going. You’re talking to this other person (because it’s ONLY talking, right?) and confiding in him/her things you should be telling your significant other.

In my opinion, this is the worst type of cheating. I would definitely hate it if my boyfriend slept with another girl, but I’d be so much more hurt if he ended up getting invested in another girl emotionally because I wasn’t good enough or giving him enough of my time.

I know several people that have cheated before or have been cheated on. My ex was cheated on by one of his previous girlfriends and this tore him apart. I guess he still wonders to this day why she did it—I mean I guess I would wonder too and thinking that I wasn’t “good enough” would kill me. Another guy I know cheated on his last girlfriend—the girl he was in love with and claimed he wanted to marry! I guess he went out to a club and got a little too physical with another girl and his girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend) never found out. Ugh. It hurts just even thinking about it.

So what’s the rule about dating cheaters? Well, I’m all for believing that people do change but at the same time if I find out that the guy I’m seeing cheated on someone in the past, I would get skeptical. I guess every situation is different but there’s no reason as to why anyone needs to be unfaithful to the person they supposedly care about the most. Now as to if you forgive someone if they cheat on you—I guess that’s just up to you and the scenario. I know that once my trust is broken with someone it’s very hard to gain it back.